Akamuu

Yawn. Stretch.

Have I missed anything? How were the St. Louis nationals?

Shakes the dust from under his eyes.

Where did slampapi go?

Hello, Adam -

Thanks for sharing your memories of Ken. We are definitely
feeling a loss at this time, too. Others like you, from around
the country, are individually coming forward with their own
stories and offerings as news of Ken percolates out into the
world.

I am not holding or creating any accounts for a memorial fund in
Ken's name. Scott Free (CC'd in this letter) may do so, but I
don't believe anything like that is on his agenda yet, either.
To my best knowledge, no official account or fund has been
created yet in Ken's memory, though that may change.

For now, I would encourage you to pick a cause and corresponding
nonprofit organization, and support it generously in Ken's name.
If you know Ken, we have faith that you'll pick something good.
Please tell us about it, too: whom you chose to support, and
what you did to help them. Then we can forward that info to his
family, and share news of that among his friends here and
elsewhere. There are many causes he participated in, and you
might be able to extend this list yourself... peace, bilingual
education, progressive politics, literacy, fringe/punk music,
LGBT/Q rights. You shouldn't have too much trouble finding
someone or something to help.

We'll let you know how memorials progress here as plans are set.
After Thursday, we should have a better idea of how Ken's
friends in Chicago will celebrate his life. If there is
something you'd like to send to represent sympathies from you
and others in the Boston area, please let us know. I am
advocating a poets' memorial, owing to Ken's significance among
his peers here and elsewhere around the US.

with respect and thanks -
- Kurt Heintz

I just got an e-mail from Blithe House Quarterly telling me that BHQ staffer Ken Hunt, [BHQ associate publisher, 2003-2004], performance artist,
poet, and activist died today from complications of brain damage.

(from the e-mail):
I spoke to his lovely sister Susan on the phone, and she told me there is an
autopsy being done to learn what happened to him on Saturday when he was found unconscious near the El train station. When I know more information, I'l forward it to you and you can pass it along to those who want to know.

Right now we're talking around of putting a public memorial event [in Chicago] next week to remember Ken, by inviting his friends and peers to read/perform or reminisce about Ken's work, and his life. As soon as a date and time is planned, I'll let you know. Anyone who wants to help organize this is welcome to talk to me, Scott Free (homolatte@scottfree.net), or Kurt Heinz (kurtericheintz@yahoo.com). I want this
memorial to be a group effort, and dont want anyone to feel
excluded or out of the loop. So pass along the info, and if
you have
a venue [in Chicago] you'd like to recommend, please do so by replying
to these emails (and attaching more contacts.) or by
forwarding it. {I hope his friends in Washington state, Texas and New
Mexico do something for him as well. I'll be participating in the
Chicago memorial.-- Aldo]

Right now I'm suggesting having the memorial at Big Star
Cafe, it's
the same space that Scott Free's Homolatte has been at,

(I am checking on the availability of Big Star - Scott)

, since it seems a focal point of Ken's life and a
lot of his friends locally know the space.
Big Star Cafe 1439 W Jarvis. Jarvis L stop - walk east
(southeast corner of Jarvis and Greenview) [in Chicago].

I could try to record the event and post it online so the
people who cant make it to the memorial in Chicago can
listen in and share.

Another idea I wanted to put out is instead of sending
flowers, to make donations to a charity that Ken Hunt would
have liked money going to. Anyone have any suggestions? It
would be nice if it were some sort of
poetry/journalism/hiv/gay/art organization.

(I'll make an announcement about this to the Homolatte
group when the decision has been made - Scott)

Anyone who wants to reminisce on Ken Hunt's work can do so
by visiting the wonderful page done by Kurt Heinz at http://voices.e-poets.net/HuntK

Completely edited

I assumed the contract in Mesa was written by one of the slammasters. I still say that I understand why the contract was written, even if I don't agree with its extreme measures.

I also wish ragan luck in starting a new venue in the tri-city area. I hope he finds a community more supportive of his vision of slam than the current venues in Mesa can offer.

These days, writing about slam is nearly as much fun to me as listening to someone perform a poem about how and why they wrote said poem. Kkkut. Slice.

I'd rather be writing about my inkkkredibly fun life being a barrista in a kkkoffeehouse that has akkktual kkkustomers. I have so many kkkool stories about kkkoffee kkkups, you wouldn't believe.

Anyhow, I'm debating kkkombining akamuu with insafemode. I rarely use this journal anymore, and I feel bad that I haven't even looked at this friends list since.... It's been almost a year. I don't even reply to kkkomments in a timely fashion. If you're interested in what I'm into, outside of slam, please feel free to add insafemode. (Don't worry hot_rod_poet, it's no longer all gay porn stories. Seriously, it's only like 93% gay sex stories, now.) I'll not only add you back, but I'll put you into the "What I will actually read" filter. Who knows, in a week, I might just merge akamuu into insafemode anyway, for the hell of it.

Anyhow, here's all I'm gonna write about slam right now:

Highlights in slam this calendar year:

*iWPS: a well-run event full of more well-performed, well-written poetry than I've seen in a long time. Sure, there was still a whole heap of shit to wade through, but pound for pound (not like Ezra Pound at all, thank you) there was a higher percentage of quality work at iWPS than there is in your average Norton Anthology.

*Protest Cookie

*Workshopping with mom_star

*I'm not in AZ

*Interpretive dance with ahimsajain to the tune of java_poet's work during an open mic at the iWPS

*Who knew how much Delaware rocked? Damn, kids. Damn.

*The editor of The Boston Daily Metro is named Saul Williams. No shit. Sha-clack-clack.

*Tonight's Cantab Slam filled with people like Richard Cambridge, mom_star, hot_rod_poet, and Kit (formerly Laura Yan). I won it (on a time penalty against mom_star...she was amazing tonight) using mostly not my traditional slam stuff (I've only ever slammed "Where is the Mango Princess?" against Morris before, and I don't think I've slammed "42" since I lived in Vermont).

Lowlights in Slam This Calendar Year

*I'm becoming too jaded and cynical to really enjoy myself. It's not that slam is sucking more, it's that my attitude toward it is.

*That my favorite venue (Lizard Lounge) only respects the poetry that I'm least proud of.

*That I perform the poetry I'm least proud of anyway, because it wins slams.

*That I even give a fuck about winning slams. I know it's a scam, it's one of the reasons I've always enjoyed it. It's hard to get angry about losing something when you realize it's just a brilliant bullshit format designed to foster interest in poetry. Still, I find myself getting frustrated watching slams, especially if I'm not in them. It's like I feel that all judges should share my opinion of everyone's work. God, what a boring world that would be (though the readings would be, you know, way better and stuff). I want my rampant score apathy back!

*Stage names are getting stupider and more pretentious by the year. Who thought you could get more pretentiously named than Poetri? Versiz? Da Real One? You know, I like the first two people I named, and have never met or had any interaction with the third, but those names...great googledy moogledy. Morris has a cool stage name, Big Poppa E is amusing, I won't begrudge names like Chunky or P-Nut Butta (though I will laugh when I see them together), but names that reference the fact that you're a writer or that you're some sort of "golden child" or "prophet" (*please note I am not making the profit pun*...fuck). Some days, the only thing that keeps me from tearing out all my hair is knowing that Tranzit Thawt had the self-respect to morph into Christopher Johnson. Next time I slam against a pretentious slam poet name, I'm going to slam under Poetaster Curmudgeon.

**Side Note**: It has come to my attention that certain poets in Mesa, AZ have offered a certain female from Boston $250 to put a Mesa Slam sticker on my car. What the fuck, guys? Since when do I have a car?

I'm perhaps getting too jaded to enjoy slam as a participant. Luckily, I got to enjoy some spectator time and socializing time to make it worth while.

Tonight I filed my first ever poetry protest. Nothing malicious. No one did anything evil. A simple mistake was made that altered my rotation, my poem selection, etc. I would have felt much better if it had been some shithead that I had a grudge with, or was amazingly stupid. Unfortunately, it was someone really cool whose work, friendship, and general demeanor, I worship. Filing a protest sucked. Sucking more, knowing that there was nothing that could be done. I was all set to sit in my seat and fume as the next poet got up, but that next poet was named Blues, and his poem was THE highlight of our bout. Well written, well-performed. It made me smile in ways sappy slam poetry never makes me smile. So kudos to Blues, congrats on being #1 at the end of day one of competition.

I worked myself up so much over round one that I completely changed my delivery for Deconstructing Freedom, improving it vastly, but pushing it just over the time limit. The time penalty moved me down another space in the rankings. Unhappy Adam is now somewhere in, I think, the top half by not very much. Otherwise it's the bottom half by not very much. Either way, hovering around the middle.

My bout went a little heavy on the Victim Poetry. Either the writer or their close friend or relative is the victim of some osrt of social stigma. Even I fell into it by doing "Deconstructing Freedom." Luckily, some of the Victim Poetry in my bout was very well written. The ONLY poet who performed two non-Victim poems was Burlington VT's Geof Hewitt, who, naturally, came in last for doing non-Victim poetry. That was a pity.

After the bout I was in, was The Killer Bout: Roger Bonair-Agard, lowhumcrush, emceereeree, aurorabell, rialisticprose, randomcelestial, Chris August, Christobell, Michael Guinn, and Dan Vaughn. I'm tempted to make all sorts of "she was robbed in this round" and, "how the hell did he outscore her" comments EXCEPT that the scores were extremely tight: all poets were within a point until the last two poets. It was really luck. No one got robbed. No one coasted. The bout just was what it was: a slobberknocker.

On the Awesome Side, the winner of the bout? Chris fucken August. Congrats, Chris, you earned it. The other poets were on the top of their games performing, for the most part, excellent work.

After the slam was a Sex Sells Reading (kinda like an erotic slam ends up, not like an erotic slam is supposed to be) that featured, among other things "a hiccuping nut", various things that shouldn't be done with food, The Shane, and asthecrowflies's amazing performance of both "Girlfriend", AND Brenda Moosey's "Anaconda."

And Zork ordered a ton of pizza for everybody, which made my stomach happy, as I'd previously only eaten candy hearts since I arrived in Worcester. They don't provide the nourishment that human hearts do.

I know I promised gossip, but there isn't a lot that's fit for public consumption. No one's inappropriately hooking up in front of me. I have not seen any nudity at all. Shit, if it wasn't for birthday festivities, no one would have been entertainingly drunk/hungover yet. So far the biggest drama is the "Impeach the Asshat" t-shirt drive; I am Swiss on the subject.

The venues rock the casbah. Big ups to javabill, mom_star, newpoetik & crew. I haven't had this much fun watching poetry since The Venice Beach vs. 2 other teams bout in Chicago in 99. I love the ability to do a headstand in one venue, fall over and land in another. No one even had to worry about the snow until the end of the night.

I'm entirely too tired to be writing this update. Best of luck to almost everyone in tomorrow's bouts. Those not being wished luck, don't take it personally. It's not that I don't like you, I just don't want you to finish higher than me.

The Tattler would be so ashamed of me. Hopefully I'll summon the effort to make shit up tomorrow.

National Poetry Slam Events have always felt false to me. Three hundred people shaking hands and telling each other how wonderful they are. This is MY shortcoming, not the event's. I just don't believe there are that many nice, friendly people in the world writing slam poetry. On the other hand, I CAN and DO believe that sixty individuals who have no support group save each other (no teams, no entourages, no coaches) can be honest when they have a little love fest. Tonight was a love fest.

I arrived a bit early to the iWPS on account of how angry I was becoming at a certain institution, and how sitting in my house was not helping things. So by 6:30 I was in the back office of the Bijou Theatre in Worcester, filling poet bags with special gifts (no, not the smelly kind you find in diapers). I was playing catch up with asthecrowflies, javabill, newpoetik, and rwgill as I packed the bags. When I was done, I noticed a lot of really cool poets I hadn't seen in ages had begun to trickle in poetryslam, buddywakefield, lowhumcrush, hairy_lamb and a whole mess of people without LJs.

After unsuccessfully trying to hook up my wireless modem in the hotel (hotel is having some issues, not my computer, for a change), Jose de Gouveia, java_poet, randomcelestial & I headed back to The Bijou to catch the end of The Last Chance Slam.

Congrats to hairy_lamb for winning the final(?) spot. Runner-ups for the next available slots include Kit (formerly Laura Yan of the girlsnqueers, which confused the fuck out of me when we "met"), Mekai (probably spelled wrong...sorry), and anselicious. I'd like to say how wonderful a slam it was, but I was so overwhelmed by the volume of cool people I've been missing, that I didn't give it the attention it deserved.

A little bit apres-slam, the birthday girl, aurorabell showed up, and mom_star, imsonshyne, asthecrowflies, lowhumcrush, Zork, and a cute gay boy whose boyfriend was downstairs (sigh), holed up in a hotel room eating cake and drinking until we were kicked out of our room. Is that a new slam event record? All we were doing were singing happy birthday, discussing vaginal birth stories, dry thumbs, and smoking out the windows of the non-smoking room. Seriously, it was under an hour. They didn't kick us out of the hotel, though, they just moved us downstairs.

During the move, asthecrowflies & I bunny hopped home to chez Macmillan, where we chatted with javabill into the dangerously close to the slam time limit hours of the morning.

I also had the pleasure of seeing rialisticprose, thesilentone, badgary, january_embers, Just Cause, Jesse from Worcester sometimes Burlington, Corbet Dean, ted_badger, and buddy_wakefield, who asked me if the bar he'd wandered into was a gay bar. Not being from Worcester, myself, I was unable to confirm or deny that the bar down the street from the Bijou is full of attractive gay men. ("well, I'm delirious, so maybe they weren't attractive"-- Buddy Wakefield)

Another highlight: hot_rod_poet suggesting a new series of Poet Bingo Cards. I promise the next entry will have less LJ User tags, and more exciting info, like scores, gossip, and internal drama.

akamuu Worcester Review Reference Free since 2001.

I am incredibly tired of reading rants and whining about the Bush reelection from people who thought they could bring down the system by writing "poems" about it.

If you want to be a poet, for the love of God start writing poetry instead of soapbox rants. If you want to be a political activist, skip the next slam and go to a Democratic committee meeting, send all the profits from your chapbook to the Communist party, sign up to be a research assistant for the lawyer who decides to sue the hell out of Diebold. Do something, anything, proactive.

I'm not saying that being a poet and a being a political activist are two mutually exclusive things. Certainly, Jared Paul and Jerry Quickley do it. Fuck, Quickley even went to Iraq for Operation: Human Shield. He's therefore allowed to write as many crappy poems about Bush as he wants (though, odds are, he'll choose to write something else). But for the most part, the people claiming outrage over this election are, at best armchair quarterbacks who have no concept of how our political system works. At worst, the people claiming outrage are hypocrites who didn't even vote.

Me? I'm not outraged. I'm not even surprised. It was a close race and this time, there isn't much of a dispute over the fact that they won just as fair and square as any politician wins (because really, name a politician from this century who played fair). But I'm not a political activist. I don't even play one on stage.

"But Adam," the impersonal pronoun, you, asks "how is this rant being proactive?" It's not. Most people stopped reading this LJ a while ago. insafemode is much more interesting. This is a warning to anyone who comes to any slam venue that I go to (and, admittedly, I'm not going to that many these days). From now on, every time I hear some "poet" use their stage time for political rants, I'm going to heckle them like they were a politician. I'm going to ask them to back up facts, prove their point of view because that's what you have to do with rhetoric. If I'm judging, you get bonus points for actually being able to back up the shit you get heckled on.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled friends page. "Woe is me, how did this happen?" is already in progress.

Democrats are pussies.

Having watched the main news websites (MSNBC, Fox News, CNN, ABC News), I'd like to point out the obvious. The Right Wing Media is giving too much benefit of the doubt by calling all the swing states early. The Left Wing Media is a bunch of pussies for conceding everything as quickly as possible in the guise of being "first" with the news.

At first I thought CNN was woefully behind in the news. Then I realized, they are actually waiting for confirmation of facts before they go calling a state for either candidate. They currently have the count at Bush:249, Kerry: 242, and they haven't called Ohio either way. Most other outlets claimed Bush was one vote away two hours ago.

I'm not saying this makes me more optimistic about Kerry's chances, but should something miraculous occur, Kerry's win would have more credence if a majority of the media outlets hadn't chomped at the bit to declare Bush's victory.

When the streetlight hits at just the right angle
And the toilet won't stop flushing
When the engine of every car that passes is playing your song
You will remember him

You will remember the smell of his deoderant mixed with sweat
Which knuckles he cracked before he laid down next to you

His peculiar snore and inability to understand sarcasm will escape you
You won't remember his inferiority complex
How he beat your understanding nature into you
You will focus only on the taste of his skin
The way he brushed the hair out of your eyes
How he left you for Someone Else

Someone Else with more money and lower expectations
Someone Else with newer and more interesting insecurities
Someone Else with a penchant for tolerance and a large thyroid gland

Someone Else

Someone Else has a lazy eye and a recurring case of crabs
Someone Else enjoys country music Boone's Farm
And the company of old men with shrivelled dicks and fat wallets
Someone Else is a sea sponge who mistakes patience for understanding

Fuck Someone Else
Actually
Fucking Someone Else is unadvisable
Not because you don't know where they've been
But because you have a pretty good idea
And one of those places is at a Motel 8 in Des Moines

Forget about Someone Else
Find Another Person willing to take your shit and turn it into fertilizer
Use that fertilizer to grow a garden
Cultivate that garden and cook you a nice vegan meal
Thereby making you eat your own shit
But not in that "eat shit and die" sort of way
Another Person would make you eat shit and live healthier

Another Person would be willing to put up with your nervous breakdowns and tears
Take those tears and bottle them
Wait for them to ferment into dreams that they would then drink with you

Actually that sounds kind of over the top for Another Person
Let's pretend Someone Else said that

Another Person would hide behind doorways and attack you with kisses
Hold you like a grudge

Someone Else will tell you that if you keep your chin up your eyes forward your head held high
Another Person will find you
Someone Else will tell you to smile
That if you keep pointing that best face forward it will stick
But an eternal optimist is cursed forever to see the bright side of things
And despite what Someone Else will tell you
Seeing too much brightness will make you go blind
You'll be stumbling around The Wrong Part of Town
Another Person's image burned into your retinas

Another Person is never under the appropriate sofa cushion
Doesn't post ads on Craigslist.org
If you keep checking the refrigerator when the light goes out Another Person won't be there
Another Person is hiding under a pile of your missing socks
Behind you when you look both ways while crossing the street
Another Person is in your front pocket next to your keys
Waiting for you in the last place you'd think to look
Because if you keep looking for Another Person after you've actually found them
You'll end up with Someone Else

Last week GOP Chairman Ed Gillespie sent an extraordinary letter to the group Rock the Vote requesting that it "cease and desist" from promoting its campaign warning young voters that the government may reinstate the draft. Gillespie threatened to take legal action and said the group's non-profit status could be in jeopardy. In an extraordinary letter sent last week that has received almost no media attention, Republican chief Ed Gillespie wrote to the group and accused it of "promoting a false and misleading campaign designed to scare America's youth into believing that they may be drafted to serve in the military."

Right, because using scare tactics to get people to vote for a specific cantidate would be wrong.

Democrats:

* Richard Gephardt: Air National Guard, 1965-71.
* David Bonior: Staff Sgt., Air Force 1968-72.
* Tom Daschle: 1st Lt., Air Force SAC 1969-72.
* Al Gore: enlisted Aug. 1969; sent to Vietnam Jan. 1971 as an army journalist in 20th Engineer Brigade.
* Bob Kerrey: Lt. j.g. Navy 1966-69; Medal of Honor, Vietnam.
* Daniel Inouye: Army 1943-47; Medal of Honor, WWII. He lost an arm.
* John Kerry: Lt., Navy 1966-70; Silver Star, Bronze Star with Combat V, Purple Hearts.
* Charles Rangel: Staff Sgt., Army 1948-52; Bronze Star, Korea.
* Max Cleland: Captain, Army 1965-68; Silver Star & Bronze Star, Vietnam.
* Ted Kennedy: Army, 1951-53.
* Tom Harkin: Lt., Navy, 1962-67; Naval Reserve, 1968-74.
* Jack Reed: Army Ranger, 1971-1979; Captain, Army Reserve 1979-91.
* Fritz Hollings: Army officer in WWII; Bronze Star and seven campaign ribbons.
* Leonard Boswell: Lt. Col., Army 1956-76; Vietnam, DFCs, Bronze Stars, and Soldier's Medal.
* Pete Peterson: Air Force Captain, POW. Purple Heart, Silver Star and Legion of Merit.
* Mike Thompson: Staff sergeant, 173rd Airborne, Purple Heart.
* Bill McBride: Candidate for Fla. Governor. Marine in Vietnam; Bronze Star with Combat V.
* Gray Davis: Army Captain in Vietnam, Bronze Star.
* Pete Stark: Air Force 1955-57
* Chuck Robb: Vietnam
* Howell Heflin: Silver Star
* George McGovern: Silver Star & DFC during WWII.
* Bill Clinton: Did not serve. Student deferments. Entered draft but received #311.
* Jimmy Carter: Seven years in the Navy.
* Walter Mondale: Army 1951-1953
* John Glenn: WWII and Korea; six DFCs and Air Medal with 18 Clusters.
* Tom Lantos: Served in Hungarian underground in WWII. Saved by Raoul Wallenberg.


Republicans

* Dick Cheney: did not serve. Several deferments, the last by marriage. Seven deferments. Seven.
* Dennis Hastert: did not serve.
* Tom Delay: did not serve.
* Roy Blunt: did not serve.
* Bill Frist: did not serve.
* Mitch McConnell: did not serve.
* Rick Santorum: did not serve.
* Trent Lott: did not serve.
* John Ashcroft: did not serve.
* Jeb Bush: did not serve.
* Karl Rove: did not serve.
* Saxby Chambliss: did not serve. "Bad knee." The man who attacked Max Cleland's patriotism.
* Paul Wolfowitz: did not serve.
* Vin Weber: did not serve.
* Richard Perle: did not serve.
* Douglas Feith: did not serve.
* Eliot Abrams: did not serve.
* Richard Shelby: did not serve.
* Jon! Kyl: did not serve.
* Tim Hutchison: did not serve.
* Christopher Cox: did not serve.
* Newt Gingrich: did not serve.
* Don Rumsfeld: served in Navy (1954-57) as flight instructor.
* George W. Bush: failed to complete his six-year National Guard; got assigned to Alabama so he could campaign for family friend running for U.S. Senate; failed to show up for required medical exam, disappeared from duty.
* Ronald Reagan: due to poor eyesight, served in a non-combat role making movies. *And then confused the movies with real life.
* B-1 Bob Dornan: Consciously enlisted after fighting was over in Korea.
* Phil Gramm: did not serve.
* John McCain: Silver Star, Bronze Star, Legion of Merit, Purple Heart and Distinguished Flying Cross.
* Dana Rohrabacher: did not serve.
* John M. McHugh: did not serve.
* JC Watts: did not serve.
* Jack Kemp: did not serve. "Knee problem," although continued in NFL for 8 years.
* Dan Quayle: Journalism unit of the Indiana National Guard.
* Rudy Giuliani: did not serve.
* George Pataki: did not serve.
* Spencer Abraham: did not serve.
* John Engler: did not serve.
* Lindsey Graham: National Guard lawyer.
* Arnold Schwarzenegger: AWOL from Austrian army base.


Pundits & Preachers

* Sean Hannity: did not serve.
* Rush Limbaugh: did not serve (4-F with a 'pilonidal cyst.')
* Bill O'Reilly: did not serve.
* Michael Savage: did not serve.
* George Will: did not serve.
* Chris Matthews: did not serve.
* Paul Gigot: did not serve.
* Bill Bennett: did not serve.
* Pat Buchanan: did not serve.
* John Wayne: did not serve.
* Bill Kristol: did not serve.
* Kenneth Starr: did not serve.
* Antonin Scalia: did not serve.
* Clarence Thomas: did not serve.
* Ralph Reed: did not serve.
* Michael Medved: did not serve.
* Charlie Daniels: did not serve.
* Ted Nugent: did not serve.

for J*me, who is leaving & Star who wrote the musical part quite a while ago

I was sitting in the past
Arranging my demons by soundtrack
When the present limped in like a leper on Prom Night
Sorry if we got off on the wrong foot
Mind if I cut in?

I was just about to write him off
When my pen
Sensing it might have to endure a night in The Wrong Part of Town
Dropped ink
Said Hey, asshole, this train is going in the wrong direction

To be fair
The train was headed exactly where the train needed to go
I was the one going the wrong way
So I got off

Had I gone just one more stop
I would have missed the last train headed in the direction I was going

So dance me a jig
A healthy mamushka for being in just the right place
At the last available time
Serendippitydooda

Now my life is headed in the right direction
Forward
Not straight
Nothing in my life is straight
Even this train bends slightly to the left
Just like my politics

The next station is Back Bay
South End
Nothing straight
The train is about to move forward
When a cute boy looking slightly familiar
Enters the train like a cliché in purple prose
And sits across from me
In exactly the same formation my ex and I used to sit in before I exed him

Oh cute boy who waltzed into my train at Back Bay
Thanks for the split of your lips
The spin of your pupils
Thanks for the jacket rubbing hat pulling down flirtation

I don't know what possessed me to unbury my cowboy hat
Or the matching leather jacket
What divine force laid out not just a complimentary t-shirt
But one that matched my shirt, my hat & my jacket
I never match

Oh cute boy whose jazz hands split atoms of square dancing oxygen
Thanks for the looping eights and zeros of your phone number
The nines with tails that bend slightly to the left
Just like the train
You who likes unshaven men with empty pens and full stomachs
Thanks for the crash course in How to Seduce a Man in Just Six T Stops

Someone get me off this train of thought
I want to pirouette through the turnstiles
Leap over smokers evicted from bars
The last barricades between you and my house

I've got to get home because
I've got your number
Even if you are iron on beautiful
Static in my head makes my judgment intensified
I said
Touch me like you want me
Touch me like I want to be
Touch me cause I want to be your sweet nothing*

I've got to get home so I can call you
I've got to get home so I can freak out
I've got to get home so I can do the monkey in my living room

Yes
The dance

Did you think I meant
I've got to get home so I can frantically masturbate and fling shit at my walls?

Ok
Maybe that too
But I was talking about the dance

I don't dance
I use up all of my rhythm in writing
If I do the Marcarena at a wedding I lose a sonnet
Everytime I jitterbug an entire chapter of my novel goes unwritten
I can't spare the words to tango with you

So don't tickle my spine with your tittering giggles
Don't move my feet with your arched brow flirtations
If I'm going to write you a love poem I've got to stand the fuck still

I'm tired of writing love poems
I want to live one

Let's be a dance
Not just a slow dance
Let's be the slow dance
Stairway to Heaven
Hotel California
November fucken Rain
Whatever overlong sappy rock ballad they play at the end of eighth grade dances

I want us to be toe sliding
Head on shoulder
Hands on waist
Neck kissing
Sway dancing

So take my hand
Let's live this present one step at a time



* a slightly tweaked to fit the poem version of thisisstar's "Sweet Nothing"

This has been a silly departure from my recent writing style. No poetasters were harmed in the writing of this ditty.

Did anyone else notice how much Bush's closing statement resembled an abusive boyfriend trying to keep his girlfriend form leaving him?

"We've been through a lot together as a country...I will get better..." tomorrow good things will happen.

Some lovers have "We'll always have Paris." Bush and his country (as well as his OBGYN lovers) have "Don't forget Poland."

The trend in advertising these days seems to be taking eighties new wave pop songs and slightly reworking them to fit various products. This isn't a new concept. In the eighties, there were a lot of doo-woppish fifties and sixties product jingles, and in the nineties every crappy Old Navy/The Gap ad included something vaguely disco.

Just think, we're only ten years or so away from plumbing commercials with talking toilets with animated handles singing "Jiggle what? Jiggle who?"

Note sent home from Psheya's Reading and Writing teacher:

Please reminded Psheya to remember that he need to bring his reading book home in his green apple bag.

Cantab Slammaster Simone Beaubien, Lizard Lounge Slammaster Jeff Robinson, and Cambridge Troublemaster Adam Stone would like to announce their bid for the 2007 National Poetry Slam. Expect the announcement from Simone on the Slammasters listserv, and from Jeff on the Poetry Listserv. Feel free to ask any questions to any of us, just understand that at this point, we don't have too many answers. What we've got are a buttload of venues (most of them 18+ not 21+) within walking distance of each other and a few hotels and dorms, and a group of experienced volunteers and PR people.

If you've ever put on an NPS or even just put in a failing bit, expect an e-mail from me soon. The rest of y'all slammasters I'll see in Chicago this spring.